I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
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We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
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I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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