Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
