I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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