So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
She bit a glass in half.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
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