You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I am in a vortex of obligation.
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
All I want is dick and wine.
I need to align my fucking chakras
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
