if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
