Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
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