I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize