if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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