She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Randomize
