a queef is a wish your heart makes.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Randomize
