You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Randomize
