walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize