I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
if i died would you start the facebook group?
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
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