hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
Pants are for mortals
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
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