Dual....:-)
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
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