first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
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