I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
