i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
