You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
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