living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize