break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
We just shotgunned beers for America
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
