Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
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