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I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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