grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
