You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Is her dick bigger than yours?
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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