I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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