Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
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Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
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we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
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