Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
