Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Randomize
