Cold hands, warm shart.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
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