It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
