You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Randomize
