yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Randomize