I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
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