K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
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