You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Randomize
