i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
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