Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Randomize