I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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