Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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