her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
you win again, gameday.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
