Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I take back everything I said about communal showers
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
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