Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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