Your face is a jimmy john
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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