someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
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You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
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Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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