Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
