i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
