i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
