quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
